Thursday, July 16, 2009

Bar Blues


In case you are wondering where I have been, I have spent the last two months in the state of Columbia, at a place called Blackacre to be precise. There I have been dealing with all sorts of characters whose names usually start with the letters “P” and “D.” These crazy people like to run each other over (as well as commit a wide variety of other torts and crimes), that is, whenever they are not selling widgets. Oh, and I can’t forget Harry and Wanda, one of whom is always dying or else seeking a divorce.

That’s right; I’m studying for that California Bar exam where I will spend three days for six hours a day sorting these fictional characters’ problems out. Just in case you haven’t heard of it, the bar exam is a particularly sadistic procedure that lawyers have set up in order to limit their competition so that they can increase their fees. CA lawyers are especially sadistic (read greedy); adding an extra day, covering more substantive law, and doubling the length of the performance tests.

If I learn everything in all these books then I can pass for sure.

April has recently been circulating this picture with the false and misleading (a favorite word combination of lawyers) claim that Kiki studies more then I do.

What she failed to mention is that Kiki sleeps all day and this was like the one time she ever studied Barbri.

Well, I guess I had better get back to work…

Oh, but one more thing. Don’t you people taking the Utah bar and other two-day bars call me after day two and brag about how you’re all done. I’ll bite your heads off.

3 comments:

ebv said...

I am so sorry, Steven. My own woes are only 2/3 of yours. Best of luck, Dr. Garff!

Matt and Karyna Bouslog said...

I wish you much luck, that's a rough ride. Love that pic of Kiki "studying" -she's got nothing on u.

Jerkolas said...

Ugh, thats a lot of reading and if there is one thing grad school has taught me is that professional reading is lame. Good luck!